Last three days I saw 2 postgraduate students were arguing about their paper work. Then an argument became serious and it took place infront of many other postgraduate students. I felt distracted and stunned looking at the two 'mature' students when one of them yelled and pulled the paper work from her friend's hand and torn the paper work. Oh my goodness!, I was not comfortable with the situation. I don't know the real issue of the problem and I have no right to be in anyone's side (none of my business anyway) but my issue here is that in my opinion we should control our anger and emotion infront of others. I don't mean that we have to be hypocrite but when we lost our anger it shows the 'dark' side of us and people can jump into any conclusion about our behaviour.
I know that most of the postgraduate students now are in tense towards the end of the semester with the upcoming dateline of paper works and final examination. However, when working with others try to control our tense. Argument is normal. Anger is also completely normal, usually it is healthy human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems such as problems in our work and in relationships with our friends.
Thus, in my opinion;
1. When we have an argument, never argue infront of others because it can drop your friends 'waterface'.
2. When our argument become heated, we need to slow down, calm ourself, think through our responses. Never say the first thing that comes into our head, but slow down and think carefully about what we want to say. At the same time, listen carefully to what the our friend is saying and take our time before answering.
I know that most of the postgraduate students now are in tense towards the end of the semester with the upcoming dateline of paper works and final examination. However, when working with others try to control our tense. Argument is normal. Anger is also completely normal, usually it is healthy human emotion. But when it gets out of control and turns destructive, it can lead to problems such as problems in our work and in relationships with our friends.
Thus, in my opinion;
1. When we have an argument, never argue infront of others because it can drop your friends 'waterface'.
2. When our argument become heated, we need to slow down, calm ourself, think through our responses. Never say the first thing that comes into our head, but slow down and think carefully about what we want to say. At the same time, listen carefully to what the our friend is saying and take our time before answering.
3. It's natural to get defensive when we're criticized, but don't fight back. Instead, we have to listen what's underlying words our friends want to tell. It may take a lot of patient questioning on our part, and it may require some breathing space, but don't let our anger or our partner's get into discussion spin out of control.
1 comment:
Zu,
Masa belajar ni elakkan ada masalah dengan orang. Tengok orang gaduh pun perlu dijauhi supaya tidak menyerabutkan kepala sendiri dengan masalah orang lain. Hati perlu tenang dan jiwa mesti bersih agar ilmu senang masuk. Itu jelah nasihat nak bagi.
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